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Satan


Stuie
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A few minutes before the church services started, the congregation were sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church.

Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

 

Soon the church was empty except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence..

 

So Satan walked up to the man and said, 'Do you know who I am?'

 

The man replied, 'Yep, sure do.'

 

'Aren't you afraid of me?' Satan asked.

 

'Nope, sure ain't.' said the man.

 

'Don't you realize I can kill you with one word?' asked Satan.

 

'Don't doubt it for a minute,' returned the old man, in an even

tone.

 

'Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying AGONY for

all eternity?' persisted Satan.

 

'Yep,' was the calm reply.

 

'And you are still not afraid?' asked Satan.

 

' Nope,' said the old man

 

More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, 'Why aren't you afraid

of me?'

The man calmly replied,

"Been married to your sister for 48 years".

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Talking of being married for some time.............

 

Yesterday my wife Dilys asked why I didn't do something useful with my time. She suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys. I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a parachute club.

She said "Are you nuts? You're 64 years old and you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"

I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card.

She said to me, "You idiot, where are your glasses! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!"

I'm in trouble again and don't know what to do! I signed up for five jumps a week!

 

Terry.

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