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Irish Medical Dictionary


Maverick Martin
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Irish Medical Dictionary...

 

Medical Term ------------------- Irish Definition

Artery --------------------------- The study of paintings

Bacteria------------------------- Back door to cafeteria

Barium ------------------------- What doctors do when patients die

Benign-------------------------- What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean Section------------ A neighbourhood in Rome

Cat scan ----------------------- Searching for Kitty

Cauterize----------------------- Made eye contact with her

Colic ---------------------------- A sheep dog

Coma--------------------------- A punctuation mark

Dilate--------------------------- To live long

Enema-------------------------- Not a friend

Fester--------------------------- Quicker than someone else

Fibula--------------------------- A small lie

Impotent ---------------------- Distinguished, well known

Labour Pain--------------------- Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff-------------------- A Doctor's cane

Morbid -------------------------- A higher offer

Nitrates ------------------------- Rates of Pay for Working at Night,

Node ---------------------------- I knew it

Outpatient ---------------------- A person who has fainted

Pelvis --------------------------- Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative ----------------- A letter carrier

Recovery Room ---------------- Place to do upholstery

Rectum ------------------------- Nearly killed him

Secretion ----------------------- Hiding something

Seizure ------------------------- Roman Emperor

Tablet --------------------------- A small table

Terminal Illness ---------------- Getting sick at the airport

Tumour ------------------------- One plus one more

Urine ---------------------------- Opposite of you're out

 

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