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Here we go then


Jim
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My mate says you know you're getting old when:

He was watching Babe Station last night.

There was this gorgeous girl in a skimpy little French maid's outfit, pushing a vac around, bending over provocatively. And as her little skirt rode up, exposing her lovely little bottom with the little strip of black material covering her crack,all I could think was........

 

 

 

 

 

...
"We used to have a Hoover like that one!!"

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My was mowing the lawn when his young son comes
running out of the house calling to him.

“Daddy, daddy, what’s sex?” asks his son

...
For a moment my mate's dumbstruck but then decides that if his
son has asked the question, then he must do his best to
answer it.

For the next few minutes dad talks about the birds
and the bees, then human relationships, love, the sex act,
having babies – in fact he does a pretty good job of covering
every aspect.

Eventually he comes to a stop when he sees how
oddly his son is looking at him.

“Why did you want to know?” my mate asks.

“Well, Mummy said to come out and tell you that dinner...........

would be ready in two secs!!"

 

 

:D

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My mate was walking down the street earlier when this guy approached him

"Oi, are you the Muppet that was chatting my bird Julie up in the pub last Friday?" he snarled.

"I'm not sure my mate said: what does she look like?"

"That's her" he said handing him a photo
.
"It wasn't me mate," he replied............

"I only had 6 pints last Friday!!"

 

 

:lol:

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