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Wishing all our Club Members and visitors a Very Merry Christmas ×
Wishing all our Club Members and visitors a Very Merry Christmas

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Posted

Today's riddle for seniors...Here is the situation:

 

You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.

 

On your right side is a sharp drop-off.

 

On your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.

 

Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to

overtake it.

 

Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.

 

What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation ?

 

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Get your drunken arse off the merry-go-round and go home!

Posted

An attorney got home late one evening, after a very taxing day trying to get a stay of execution for a client, James Wright, who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last-minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed.

As soon as he got through the door at home, his wife started on him about, "What time of night do you call this? Where have you been?" And on and on.

Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a shot of whisky and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks.

While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client had been granted his stay of execution after all.

Finally realizing what a day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband's rear end as he was bent over naked drying his legs and feet.

"They're not hanging Wright tonight," she said.

He whirled around and screamed, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WOMAN DON'T YOU EVER STOP"!

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