DommyBoy

God Said, Adam I Want you to do Something for me." Adam said, "Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?" God said, "Go down into that valley." Adam said, "What's a valley?" God explained it to him. Then God said, "Cross the river." Adam said, "What's a river?" ! God explained that to him, and then said, "Go over to the hill......." Adam said, "What is a hill?" So, God explained to Adam what a hill was. He told Adam, "On the other side of the hill you will find a cave" Adam said, "What's a cave?" After God explained, he said, "In the cave you will find a Woman." Adam said, "What's a woman?" So God explained that to him, too. Then, God said, "I want you to reproduce." Adam said, "How do I do that?" God first said (under his breath), "Geez....." ! And then, just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well. So, Adam goes down into the valley, across the river, and over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman. Then, in about five minutes, he was back. God, his patience wearing thin, said angrily, "What is it now?" And Adam said YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THIS !!!!!! "What's a headache?"

A 90-year old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better... I have an 18-year old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think of that?" The doctor replied, "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day he was in a hurry and picked up his umbrella instead of his gun by mistake. When he got to the creek, he saw a beaver.

This is wicked Try this out & you can find out your wife/husband/boyfriend/girlfriend’s exact location by typing in their mobile phone number! Put the first 4 digits in the first box & the rest go in the second box. It really works http://www.sat-gps-locate.com Click on zoom in.

Alun, You cant have forgotten my cod already.......

Hi guys, after reading the top results from Gordon and Tel, i have the urge to catch a conger or 2. I have got tomorrow to get out for the first time since when i went out with Alun J in January. I fancy a trip out of Mudeford and i only have 1 conger mark which is off the ledge so would be grateful for any marks that are reasonably close in as the weather may turn for the worse. Anyone want to share a couple of conger marks with me. Cheers, Dom

Subject: THE BEST COMEBACK LINE EVER Marine Corp's General Reinwald was interviewed on the radio the other day and you have to read his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. FEMALE INTERVIEWER:So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base? GENERAL REINWALD: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it? GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children? GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers. GENERAL REINWALD:Well, Ma'am, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you? The radio went silent and the interview ended. Wonder why she never answered ????

Sounds like a top day Kam, well done! Wish i was out but instead sat in an office dealing with the insurance needs of pub landlords moaning all day . How big were the blondes? Dom

Sam, why not chuck a CV into an agency or 2, to get some temp work, i put my CV into a few agencies a few years back and had constant work options available to me! Just an idea! Dom

Current british Record is 9lb 2oz taken from a Stillwater near Wallingford in October 2006, but as dan said it is a real monster of the deep! Dom

Bloody hell mate thats amazing! Should have a few front cover exclusives coming your way, try and put a mention of Lonis AC in there somewhere for a bit of trade there way. Still shocked that you may have rocked the river record..... Cracking result mate well done, now see what the mags chuck your way! Dom

Cheers Adam, Well if all goes well me and Dan will make be there! Just hope for good weather lots of fish! What other boats will be turning out? Dom

Bruv that is a top result mate, if not a bit spawny! Absolute monster fish and regards to the 'secret section' of river where you caught it from i never in a million years thought they went that big there! Should win you a few awards i reckon! Dom

Paul, ill have a word with the missus and see if there is any room in the garage as it is not being used at the mo. I'll measure the garage 1st and come back to tomorrow! Dom

Are there any plans for a trailaway to Burnham-on-sea (or anywherer else for that matter) this year? If so when? Dom

Would love to mate but unfortunately the missus has decided she is working so babysitting duties for me im afraid. Oh well a day of watching that bloody kids cartoon 'Dora the Explorer' all day...............HELP! Dom

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone " Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember. My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! " It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go !" We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind ?" She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner." After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, " Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back." "Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ... Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday". And I just sat there... On the couch... ..........................Naked.

Thanks Alun for the day out on your boat.....what a boat it is aswell. It was a crackin day, good company,great weather and topped off with a good fish. Thats probably it for the winter now so a good way to end the season for me.....bring on the summer! And also a big thank you to Duncan for taking the time of sorting out a quality picture for me and sending it. It arrived at the weekend so thanks mate. Dom

Alun, Ive sent you a PM. Dom

from what i've heard, thats 2 inches more than Dom has

Am looking to get out aswell, will probably sit off the ledge though and have a go for a conger or 2. Is there still many about and what else is there to catch from there? Any Cod, Whiting, etc?

It was on ebay with a mic but when the guy delivered it he sais that he forgot it and will send it down to us at a later date.....then he emailed Dan and said that he has lost it. Its not been paid for yet so before we send it back to him we wanted to know if we could get a cheap one on its own....or we could send it back!

Honestly i do work hard.....im well busy Yeah im a bobbing bobcat too!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sle...on_version5.swf This is great.

http://www.eyegas.com/xmas05/ Attack of the sprouts. For those out there like me who hate their sprouts!

Subject: Fw: Very important....credit card scam I have just received the following warning about a credit card scam: This one is pretty slick since they provide YOU with all the information, except the one piece they want. WARNING...New Credit Card Scam. Note, the callers do not ask for your card number; they already have it. This information is worth reading. By understanding how the VISA & MasterCard Telephone Credit Card Scam works, you'll be better prepared to protect yourself. One of our employees was called on Wednesday from "VISA", and I was called on Thursday from "MasterCard". The scam works like this: Person calling says, "This is (name), and I'm calling from the Security and Fraud Department at VISA. My Badge number is 12460 your card has been flagged for an unusual purchase pattern, and I'm calling to verify. This would be on your VISA card, which was issued by (name of bank). Did you purchase an Anti-Telemarketing Device for $497.99 from a Marketing company based in Sydney?" When you say "No", the caller continues with, "Then we will be issuing a credit to your account. This is a company we have been watching and the charges range from $297 to $497, just under the $500 purchase pattern that flags most cards. Before your next statement, the credit will be sent to (gives you your address), is that correct?" You say "yes". The caller continues - "I will be starting a Fraud investigation. If you have any questions, you should call the 1- 800 number listed on the back of your card (1-800-VISA) and ask for Security. You will need to refer to this Control Number. The caller then gives you a 6-digit number. "Do you need me to read it again?" Here's the IMPORTANT part on how the scam works. The caller then says, "I need to verify you are in possession of your card". He'll ask you to "turn your card over and look for some numbers". There are 7 numbers; the first 4 are part of your card number; the next 3 are the security numbers that verify you are the possessor of the card. These are the numbers you sometimes use to make Internet purchases to prove you have the card. The caller will ask you to read the 3 numbers to him After you tell the caller the 3 numbers, he'll say, "That is correct, I just needed to verify that the card has not been lost or stolen, and that you still have your card. Do you have any other questions?" After you say No, the caller then thanks you and states, "Don't; hesitate to call back if you do", and hangs up. You actually say very little, and they never ask for or tell you the Card number but after we were called on Wednesday, we called back within 20 minutes to ask a question. Are we glad we did! The REAL VISA Security Department told us it was a scam and in the last 15 minutes a new purchase of $497.99 was charged to our card. I checked this out on snopes.com. Long story made short - we made a real fraud report and closed the VISA account. VISA is reissuing us a new number. What the scammers want is the 3-digit PIN number on the back of the card. Don't give it to them. Instead, tell them you'll call VISA or Master card directly for verification of their conversation. The real VISA told us that they would never ask for anything on the card, as they already know the information since they issued the card! If you give the scammers your 3 Digit PIN Number, you think you're receiving a credit. However, by the time you get your statement you'll see charges for purchases you didn't make, and by then it's almost too late and/or more difficult to actually file a fraud report. What makes this more remarkable is that on Thursday, I got a call from a "Jason Richardson of MasterCard" with a word-for-word repeat of the VISA scam. This time I didn't let him finish. I hung up! We filed a police report, as instructed by VISA. The police said they are taking several of these reports daily! They also urged us to tell everybody we know that this scam is happening. Please pass this on to all your family and friends. By informing each other, we protect each other.