Maverick Martin

Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: £3 Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 30 years, I suppose Woman: So a beer costs £3 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at £270. In one year, it would be approximately £3,240 correct? Man: Correct Woman: If in 1 year you spend £3,240 not accounting for inflation, the past 30 years puts your spending at £97,200 correct? Man: Correct Woman: Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 30 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari? Man: Do you drink beer? Woman: No Man: Where's your Ferrari then?

Four guys have been going to the same golfing trip to St Andrews for many years.. Two days before the group is to leave, Jack's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going. Jack's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do. Two days later, the three get to St Andrews only to find Jack sitting at the bar with four drinks set up! "Wow, Jack, how long you been here, and how did you talk your missus into letting you go?" "Well, I've been here since last night. Yesterday evening I was sitting in my living room chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and asked, 'Guess who?' I pulled her hands off, and there she was, wearing a nightie. She took my hand and pulled me into our bedroom. The room had candles and rose petals all over. Well she's been reading ‘50 Shades of Grey’...... On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes! She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did. And then she said, "Do whatever you want." So..... Here I am!

A date I am keeping pencilled in is the may bank holiday weekend but will be family and very weather dependant

Congratulations on the new boat Rich

Hi Steve and welcome to our forum and what we think is the best south coast small boat angling club Loads of information on the forum, have a poke around and see. if you have any specific questions just ask away the guys are very helpful and friendly If you send Brian an email:[email protected] he will forward you an info pack

By the looks of it they're brilliant at laying down

Mike I don't know how to get an excel file up here but you can definitely get a pdf on so that may well be the way forward

Happy birthday hooky, don't even think about being 50 YEARS OLD

Happy birthday Duncan enjoy your day

Hi Chris As I said in an email welcome to the club. Once you have paid up I will upgrade your forum status to that of club member. This will give you access to the club only section. The orkney fastliners are great boats perfect for inshore fishing in our area. Get yourself down here and start using it

Yes Brian give me a call before you come just to make sure I'm in, I should be home after 4

Brian I have some here she is welcome to have. It's 30-40mm thick as long as she wants and I don't want it back Give me a call when you want to collect

Have a great B'day Greg

Wow thats one serious piece of kit

Because it was a gay bass

No it's tidler he ate all the pies honest bless him

A very happy birthday Mikey

Hi Steve and welcome to our club You will find there are a lot of very knowledgeable guys within the club who will answer any questions you have and help you along the learning curve. As with all clubs join in and get yourself known the rest should be easy

Happy Birthday Paul

Happy Birthday Mr B..........where are you

One of these Mal http://www.screwfix.com/p/laser-jiggle-siphon-hose-1-75m-x-20mm/23447?kpid=23447&cm_mmc=Google-_-Product%20Listing%20Ads-_-Sales%20Tracking-_-sales%20tracking%20url&kpid=23447&cm_mmc=Google-_-Shopping%20-%20Mixed-_-Shopping%20-%20Mixed&gclid=CI3V5sCcxMMCFQPHtAodMFQAhA More commonly known as a syphon tube or wanka's

Thanks Richard, Don't be shy about adding useful links, the only links we don't like are those that are out and out adverts put up by traders Not long until March

I'll never catch you Jim you're to quick for me

Thank you all for your birthday wishes they really are much appreciated. The day for me started off kind of ok however why did I ever cook the breakfast? I then got dragged out shopping which isn't my favourite pastime but as it happens it wasn't to bad as I never spent a bean Veronica slipped up a bit there. Tea and cake in the afternoon was good. The day then became first class. We went to the Clay pipe for a bite to eat with the grandchildren sons daughter in laws (and wannabe daughter in laws ) brother sister friends and of course my best buddy Veronica Nice game of skittles (which I lost) good pub grub and a few sherberts. Great end to a lovely day, Not quite a catch report but was as good for me

Happy birthday Jamie