Afishionado

What Boat would suit me? The one in the magazine advert. Real boats cost far to much and are a constant drain on finances and the nervous system. However if you are determined to be daft like the rest of us and kid yourself that you will 'get it right' for a few pennies and have hours of endless fun here goes with a bit of realistic advice. Discovered this web site and must say I

The installation instructions on my DSC radio are rather confusing...... Must be 1M from compass and 1M from aerial but convenient for use! Oh yes, so just how big a boat do they think I have? Any way the real question.... I will be left with about 6 miles of spare aerial cable. Is it OK to cut this to length? Or is it like transducer cable and must be kept at the length supplied? Oh and the mike hand set is supposed to be yet anther meter away from everything else so I'm now expected to be a bl00dy cotortionist too. Please lads any tips from the 'Living in the real world' school of installing a DSC/VHF in a Warrior sized boat? Getting even madder now Mad Mike

Its mnemonics Jim but not mnemonics as we know it. Beam me up Scrappy! Mad Mike

Well done Sam, it's great to hear of a youngster with so much drive and ambition. Your dad must be mighty proud of you I think I mentioned before that I can teach you to be able to remember facts and data very easily. The system is great fun and very easy, it's ideal for exam revision etc. If you want a bit of tuition give me a shout. I can easily pop down to PYC and we can talk whilst your dad makes tea Mad Mike

Sam , any good? (see photie)

Mark's no scrubber! He's a nice boy! Mad Mike

I have a pair of new matching thermoplastic boat seats for sale. They are made out of the same sort of plastic as those garden chairs in B&Q. Price

The mane thing is not to saddle yourself with an old horse. Bridle ones enthusiasm and check the Gallop poles to find the leading bait . Use light takle and a canter weighted rod. Mad Mike

You big girls blouse Wait 'till the killer sprats start shoaling. They can strip a horse down to bone in 30 seconds. Mad Mike I can see me getting through a lot of bait when they do arrive. Does one use a scratching rig with the horse or just the harness? Aparantly the best method is trotting a live bait out Mad Mike PS I now declair open season on Horses for bait puns.........

Me and the rest of the 'Kinson death doesn't mean saying goodby' group have no prob's with the lightning. Many an old fiend has been jolted back to life as we hoist them up to the roof wrapped in Baco foil and copper wire during a storm. Believe it or not many of the reconstructed recharged lads love a bit of fishing and are often seen out in a thunder storm, hoping for the true double header. Boy you don't know what true life after death is until you've landed an 80lb conger and been hit with 57,000,000,000 Kw up yer jacksy at the same time. Thunderstorms! Love em Mad Mike PS Any one know how to straighten out sorta frizzy afro hair thassa bit singed?

Silly billy The lightning actualy hit several miles away from the boat. I think there would have been significant damage to the ferry and maybe loss of life if it had been a direct hit, as it was the BBC news last night stated it was an optical illusion. There is so much absolute tosh and urban myth surrounding lightning strikes. Like people being electrocuted in a car. Absolute balls! A car like an aircraft is a 'Faraday Cage' so the current flows around and not through it. Boats are generaly safe as the have no direct earth link. Chain ferries and the like are protected by earthing systems that safely ground the discharge. Think of the number of boats at sea, moored etc at any one time, divided by the amount of lightening discharges in a given area, and work out the colossal RANDOM chance of a lightning strike on any one boat. Then check out the odds of getting killed in a car crash. Best not go out in our cars I think!!

You big girls blouse Wait 'till the killer sprats start shoaling. They can strip a horse down to bone in 30 seconds. Mad Mike

With violent thunderstorms forcast, not a time for ones graphite rod I think . Mind you a good donner und blitzen seen from a small boat at night is rather wonderful. Talk about yer forces of nature mate!!! Mad Mike

Didn't they give it right of way back in the 90's? Any way who but a B/F would expect a chain ferry to give way to them........... Ah yes the X boats of course Mad Mike

I see in tonights Echo an official anouncement regarding 'New regulations regarding the chain ferry' Any one know what they are? Mad Mike

Coddies crafty plan........ Why not fit the transducer in the well area at the back of the boat, where all the excess water drains into or where you keep the fuel tanks. I had one mounted there in my old Seahog and it worked fine, I used epoxy rather than silicone as it did not have any bubbles in it. Coddy Coddy great minds and all that That is where I was thinking of putting it, subject to a further check of the exact hull skin/ floor set up. Mike

I have found the best (worst) rotten bottoms are after a double onion bhaji and a vindaloo, washed down with several pints of larger and lime. The breaking strain is when others on the boat leap over the side holding their noses shouting "DAIR, ID DEED FRESHD DAIR!!!" I hope this helps in your search for fishing perfection........... Mad Mike

Funuro (that's the make of the fish finder) do a fancy transom bracket Sam. The trouble is that it costs a fortune. I am trying to find a less expensive way. I think I am going to follow Martins advice and go through the double skin and through mount in the outer hull. Mike

OK guys here is the problem........ My new Samurai (Warrior 165 hull) has a double skinned hull/deck set up. Nowhere is the actual hull skin 'get at able' from inside the boat. So to fit a transducer either one has to cut a hole in the floor skin and another in the hull skin. fit the transducer through the hull and then make good the access hole one cut in the floor. OR Make some sort of bracket to transom mount the transducer on the back end of the boat. My worry here is should the transducer head protude below the hull bottom to ensure good transmission of signal when motoring along? OR Is there another way I have not thought of? Advice on a

I say! Steady on ol' chap That's possibly more than we wanted to hear about your ring Mad Mike

Thanks and I would love to have a bit of a nose round your boat as I am certain you will have some neat ideas I can copy. Just let me at it......... Mad Mike

I collected the new boat today Coooor I am in love Next few days fitting out and then the maiden trip. This will be at 4am in the morning with no one about to avoid being caught in a cock up with too many spectators. Mad Mike

HAhahahaha!! Enjoy the 3am feeds and pooie nappies mate THAT'S THE EASY BIT. YOU HAVE THE WHINING ONES, THE TERRIBLE THREES, THE FEARSOM FOURS ETC to come. These ages are easy too trust me But you just wait till the little angel (those who know will substitue 'Madam' for angel) reaches 13 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh boy you have no idea you poor innocent lad Mad Mike PS Breast feeding is best..... Good for baby and dad can play with the empties

Adam is right in as much as the slip is so flat that 'run away on it's own' cock ups are avoided. BUT the Burnham launch/recover went so smoothly because you were 'mob handed' as we used to say in Pentonville. A man and a boy would struggle and a bloke on his own would have to be well fit. I have sugested to several new to boating owners that the best thing they could do on their first trip out is to go on a quiet weekday and practice launching and recovery for an hour or so. Sort of like the 'circuit and bumps' that one does on flight training. No one has taken the advice and their boats and fingers bear the scars to this day. I feel no guilt at laughing at the state some boat owners get into on launch or recovery. To me it seems logical that the important part of trailer boating are the launch and recovery aspects. Wolloping round the bay at 20kts on a summers day is easy by comparison, yet more time is spent on that than learning a bit of basic know how......... I have noticed that as I get older and less fit and strong, I have had to use my brain and experience more. The daft thing is, is that now things go smoother than ever before. The message is clear to me.... Brute strength, an over supply of energetic rushing round don't work as well as a quiet think about the easyest way of doing the job. Here endeth the 386th lesson Mad Mike