Jim

POND More expensive than a boat, More work than a boat. Less pleasure than a boat. Get your wallet ready Paul. Jim

Bloody Well Done Sir ! ! !

Thanks James. I enjoyed the report. Jim

Happy Birthday Dave. Enjoy. Jim

I'll ditto what the others have said. Well done. Jim

Is it worth Charlie? You have only been out a couple of times on your boat, getting as bad a Jim! Dave Thanks Dave.

Tom, I've fitted a Whale Tail to my engine, so you can let me know what you think. I'm not convinced it was a good Idea ? ? ? Be a good advert for my Rod Tubes too. Jim

I'll bring a big stick to the meeting and Bash you with it Rob. Or maybe I'll just spill beer over you. Jim

Tom, I need an excuse to get Small Fry out !. You can count me in. And you're welcome to have a go at Skippering her for a while. It'd be a pleasure. Jim

Hi Shane, Reduce the file size to less than 128 K and it'll go on. Jim

Happy Birthday Trev. Jim

I'd forgotten that one Martin. Thanks, I needed cheering up. It worked. Jim

Hiya Shane, Welcome to our great club. Come along to the meetings, meet the members and join in. Lots of help from the more experienced members and Banter from Me. Did I tell you about the " Buy Jim Beer and Cakes " rule for new members ? Jim

2 things, 1 ) Bag limits sound fine, but people who don't get out fishing very often and bring a large number of fish home ( assuming they can catch them ) will have a smaller impact on fish stocks than someone who is out 3 or 4 times per week. 2 ) Our M.D. from work frequently sees people fishing the shore of Holes Bay with 6 or more rods and they admit that they are targeting and selling Bass. How do we police and stop this ? ? ? ? Jim

A very happy Birthday Sam. You'll have a hangover by the time you read this. Enjoy. Jim

It's easy to tell when the weather's crap. All the jokes come out to play. Keep them coming Gents ( and Ladies ) we have to be PC Y'know ! Jim

Indeed !

Ooooh Matron !

Sorry to hear that Paul, Knowledge is King. Do we know anyone with the expertise to fix it ? Could it be a dry joint ? Could it just be one little 3quid chip? Anyone in the club know anyone ? ? ? ? Jim

Forgot about her ? ? ? Boy are you in trouble if she see's this ! ! ! Jim

I think I will use that one Jim :-) Don't let the Missus catch you Graham.

Bloke walks into a pub, sees a cracker, Sidles over and whispers " 14 stone Penguin " The woman looked at him completely blank and said " what ? ? ? " - - - - - - - - - The man said " Well you've got to have Something to Break the Ice " Jim

Bloke goes into a pub, orders a pint and the barman hands him a free tray of nuts. The man sits at a table and takes a drink of his ale. He hears a voice say " Nice shoes Sir " - - - Almost choking, he looks around and - - nobody there. ! ! He takes another swig and hears " Nice shirt Sir " - - - Almost choking, he looks around and - - nobody there. ! ! He takes another swig and hears " Nice jacket Sir " - - - Almost choking, he looks around and - - nobody there. ! ! When he goes to order a new pint, he tells the barman what's been happening. The barman says - - - - - - - - - - - - - " Oh That'll be the Complimentary Nuts Sir " ! ! ! ! ! Jim

Bloke goes into a pub, sees two " crackers ". He orders a pint and sends a bottle of Chamagne to the Girlies. The barman says " don't waste your time and money mate ! They're a couple of Lesbians. That's O.K. says the man. He drinks his pint, gets another and does his best " suave walk " over to them , Sits down and says - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - Hi girls, Which part of Lesbia do you come from then ? ? ?