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To the yoof of today, absolutely nothing. However, to pedantic old gits like us, the

For re-waterproofing our mountain gear, we use Nikwax TX-Direct wash in. If the article is a bit festy, wash first with Nikwax Loft Tec Wash (never tried ordinary detergent - may work just as well), ensure all detergent is out of the garment and machine and then put in again with the wash-in and select a 40 degree synthetic cycle. Hang out to dry and jobs done. We find it lasts a couple of years. It's about

All that time spent practising technique only seems to have paid off. I feel someone should warn the fish! Well done, Jack and Andy. I can see we'll all be trying to blag marks from you in the future. Terry.

Nice to see the fish swim away, I should think. Where I salmon fish on the Border Esk, a few very big chub are caught every season on salmon gear and they are just thrown on the bank, being considered vermin. I have personally seen one over 9lbs just hurled in the bushes and when I remonstrated, was told my fortune in no short order. They believe there that the record could be broken every season if anybody fished for them. Terry.

Are there likely to be any pollock in by then? How much? I could possibly have two if needed. Terry.

You're right! Terry.

I have a Warrior stainless bracket fitted to the engine well on the starboard side. I haven't used it in anger until now but intend to this season. My bait tank will now dwell on the opposite side. Terry.

Do they have regional versions of this programme. I watched it all the way through on BBC South and it wasn't mentioned. Terry.

I didn't find that one at all funny, I just felt sorry for any Irish people reading it. Only joking! Terry.

I understand, Tony, that the sat nav speed is pretty damn exact and that all speedos on cars are optimistic. My Disco says I am doing 76 when the sat nav says 70 and the Mazda, 75. I wonder if there have been any cases of people challenging speeding offences when their sat nav said they were going slower at the time they were zapped. Terry.

Me too, if that's possible, Dave. Pleeeeease. Terry.

Perhaps this is what you're looking for, Jack; the place to download your own log Download e log. Hope this helps. Terry.

In my current situation, I would have to vote for number 2. However, if I was going for number 1, i.e., keeping it afloat, I don't think I'd go for an outboard. In this case, Adam's preference has a lot of merit. Terry.

If true, that's not sad, Adam. You should think yourself priviledged that you had a proper upbringing who learned the risks of life from experience, respect for yourself and others and that life doesn't owe you a living. You are, indeed, a fortunate one amongst your peers. Terry.

And something I noticed about my father's generation (born 1909) when there were no school buses (or any other sort). The older they got, the farther they had had to walk to school. In his case, when he started at age 5, the distance was 3 miles each way, which I know to be correct. Before his death aged 89, this had stretched to 5 miles each way! Nobody argued though, it wasn't worth it. He'd just claim things were different in those days. Terry.

I have to say, Adam, that having converted from bags to prop sox, I know which I prefer. They stay on, dont tear and are easy to fit and remove. Job sorted. Terry.

And if your teachers told you off in school, your father didn't go in and threaten them with physical violence, he threatened you. Terry.

Thirty six, is that all! Many happy returns, Tom and no, I haven't forgotten the camera. Hope to catch up in the next couple of weeks if the weather holds good. I'll get the bike out for a day trip. Terry.

Many happy returns, Martin. Have a virtual pint on me tonight as I will not be present at the meeting. 51,eh, who'd have guessed it? All right, form an orderly queue. Just remember, though; getting older has the advantage that, once over the hill, you begin to pick up speed again! Terry.

Because at that time she wasn't in clink. They were frit. Terry.

No, it's just the nautical branch of his Gay Badgers Brigade. Terry.

Funny that, me too. Terry.

Jas, mate. I'd never realised that being an amputee was actually a job opportunity. I should look at getting an equity card, there may be openings in Casualty, etc. Terry.

Well done, Alun and Dommie (he say's through clenched teeth). I'd put my rods away for the winter but am now wondering if I was a little premature. Terry.

MEN ARE HAPPIER! Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Our last name stays the same. The garage is all ours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. We can never be pregnant. We can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. We can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell us the truth. The world is our urinal. We never have to drive to another petrol station